EQ Thursdays at the Dollar Store-Best For You, I Promise.

by Juice on January 24, 2013

Post image for EQ Thursdays at the Dollar Store-Best For You, I Promise.

In my continuing effort to keep my new years resolution help you get your earthquake preparedness kits together, I have decided you need three things to get you inspired:effortless fun, frugality and field trips.

Oh yes, Chicas and Chicos, I am going to show you how easy it is to build your earthquake preparedness kit by going to the places you already go, shopping where you already have to go, doing things you already have to do: Grocery, Hardware Store, Bed Bath Beyond and the Dollar Store. Gawd, I love the dollar store. I hope you have a crazy dollar store like me. Every aisle a fire code violation, its packed to the rafters with things you didn’t even know existed, and tons of stuff you didn’t even  know you needed, like this “chia” penis.

Best for You, Indeed.

Best for You, Indeed.

You can find such weird and wonderful stuff at my dollar store. And good- I mean GOOD stuff.  Man, I hope you have a dollar store as awesome as mine. Especially helpful are items you can use in your EQ kit.

Your EQ Shopping List: Dollar Store EditionEQprep-dollarstorefinds


1. Disposable cutlery and kitchenware.


2. Instant disposable grills.


3. Camping supplies (seriously!)


4. Glow Tridents. Why just buy glow sticks in bulk when you can carry a glow trident? (Disclosure time: the glow trident isn’t as bright or long lasting as the emergency glow sticks they sell at the hardware store, but its way cooler. Way way, MUCH cooler.)


4. Hard Candy


5. H2O- in bulk. Seriously- my Dollar Store has tons of water, I know yours does too.

But Wait! There is more! We haven’t even gotten to the fun stuff yet.



6. Matches (Caution: Be careful not to rely on matches and grills and candles after an EQ unless you are sure there is no leaking gas- nothing says “ill-prepared for disaster” like igniting broken gas lines.)

7. 20 inch saw. No, I have no idea what you would use it for, but you can get it for a dollar.

8. Terry cloth toilet seat covers for those horrible community center potties. NOOOO not seriously. If anyone ever buys one of these to use on a public toilet, I will find your damp pee tinged ass and smack you silly. Why not just rub a stranger’s urine on your butt cheeks with your hand, instead? Filthy animals.

9. Travel bottles, just like the ones at BBB for $10.

10. Toothpaste.

11.  Green tea body wipes.

12. First aid supplies.

Yep- still more, we are just getting to the good stuff…For instance:




These sassy shower slippers (although who could even think of just wearing them in the shower.)

God in heaven, these are magnificent.

God in Heaven, You can’t afford NOT to buy these.

Heck, you can get your whole EQ wardrobe at the dollar store:

Socks, hats, mittens, T-shirts, shoes,shorts. They have it all!

Socks, hats, mittens, T-shirts, shoes,shorts. They have it all!

Including the Piece de Resistance: A Pair to Spare.

I don't have a pair to spare. Or do I?

I don’t have a pair to spare. Or do I?

Actually three pairs to spare, and look- just look- at the marketing, thought process, eloquent brilliance that went into packaging these beauties: “Traveling light?” How did they know underwear takes up so much of my precious chotchcki luggage space? And the luxury of throw them out after using them once, Hells Bells, yes. I bought so many packs. many many. 3 pairs for a dollar.

Ok cats and pajamas, pull those singles out of your g-strings, and shake it work. The Dollar Store in your town awaits.

Send me pics of your awesome dollar store finds for earthquake preparedness and I’ll  pick my favorite and send the winner a box of “Pair to Spare”.

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Vesta Vayne January 25, 2013 at 1:11 PM

I hope the 99 cent store is paying you for this one.

Please tell me you bought the chia penis.
Vesta Vayne ‘s most recent masterpiece..#marsupialMy Profile


The Mchi January 26, 2013 at 10:09 AM

I just used a green tea wipe to clean the terry cloth toilet seat cover after I disposed of my disposable thong. I am King of the Detention Center!


Juice February 8, 2013 at 10:15 PM

I thought I saw you at the 99 cent depot when I was buying the penis chia. You saucy bitch.


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